30 Years of Living

I have been doing a lot of thinking over the past few months about the past 29 years of my life. I am turning 30 in the next couple of days and it is has been weighing heavy on my mind and heart. I thought by the time that I turned 30 I would have accomplished so many more things. I thought I would be married, have a couple of kids and a house. Those particular dreams have not come true for me and they may never come. Yet so many others have come true for me. I have been blessed with so many opportunities to live life. I am grateful for all those moments. I began to think that I have not done anything with past 30 years of my life. I don't think that life turns out how we want it to. I may not have the life I have always wanted but I most definitely have a life that is filled with things that I could never have imagined. 

The past year has been a very difficult one for me. I have been through the ringer and then some. I have been called a lot of things and had a lot of things said about me that have not been true. At the time I couldn't see past the heartache and betrayal. After some time has past I can see that sometimes things just happen. People make decisions that can affect us in all different ways. I know that I am not perfect and I have also done my own share of hurting people that I didn't mean to hurt. I have learned through those moments though that it is about the people that stand beside you through it all that mean the most. I have learned about true heartache, pain, sorrow, joy and happiness over the past year. I wish that I could say that all that has come easy but it hasn't. It all came after I went through something. I fought through things that have been bigger than me and I have won at times and lost at others. I have lost friends, gained friends and developed true friendships. I have cried, laughed, screamed and felt pure joy. I have left the church and gone back to the church. I felt completely alone and completely loved. I have gained some and lost some. I have been defeated completely and I have triumphed.

 There have been times when I have wanted to just give up and throw the towel in and trust me I have come close but there has always been something to give me a little more hope. You see that is the lesson that I have learned the most that there is hope in the darkness. I lost two really close friends of mine within just a matter of weeks. One died of cancer and one took his own life. I miss them everyday and wish that they were here to be with me. I couldn't see straight for a few months. Even then I was just merely surviving. I wasn't really a human being but more of just a person. I became so numb that I couldn't really feel anything. At times I still struggle with feeling a little lost and invisible. I am not saying those things to get sympathy or praises I am saying them because they are real. It was during those times that a little light of hope was brought into my life. Sometimes it was a Facebook post that I needed to read. Sometimes it was a text or a phone call that I needed or other times it was just the stillness of the quiet that would allow me to feel a moment of hope and peace. Sometimes it was a 3 year old nephew and 2 year old niece that would just send I love you's. It was brother who would spend hours helping me how to figure out a life that was too big for me to handle on my own. It was a best friend that would break it down and help me see the smaller picture so I could breath again. It was an Aunt and Uncle that didn't judge me on anything but loved me for me. It was the little things that gave me hope to make it through until the next day. I still at times struggle through those moments of trying to stay strong and fight through it. In those times I have been reminded of hope.

You see through it all there has been hope. Having hope doesn't mean that the bad things won't happen. It just means that when those bad things do happen they are easier to handle. So if I could say anything about the past 30 years of my life it would be that they have been a roller coaster but it has been one heck of a ride. I don't have all the things that I imagined I would have by now and I might not might ever have them but that doesn't mean that I can't live a life that is full of amazing things. I would hope that the next 30 years has a little less tragedy and a lot more happiness in it. I would say though that I am grateful for the true friendships that I have, for the incredible family I have been blessed with and the job that has been given to me.

I don't know what the next 30 years will be like but I hope that they will be ones full of hope and happiness. I have great things to offer this world even if I don't have what I have always wanted. I can't focus just on that anymore. I do owe an apology to anyone that I have hurt. I am truly and deeply sorry. I hope that one day you may forgive me. I am sorry that I did so. 

To my true friends and family I am forever in your debt for all that you have done for me over the past 30 years. I am forever grateful that you have been there for me through it all. I love you so much more than you know. To being an everlasting beacon of hope and love to me. I hope that over the next years I can become a better friend, daughter, niece, aunt, cousin, sister, co-worker, employee and all around person. I hope that I can help provide hope to others as you have done for me.

Well, here's to the next 30 years!!!

Provide a house warming gift

My friend David just moved into a new place and  I got him a house warming basket. I didn't want to take a picture of it because I haven't given it to him yet.

Learn a New WorkOut

This is the work out that I have been working on how to use in my life.

No Phone for a Day

So I tried really hard to go without my phone for a whole day but all I managed to do was go without it for 18 hours. I actually have a really hard time checking my phone when it is on so I am not sure why it mattered now to have it on but for some reason I couldn't go a full 24 hours without it. I think that I am going to try that another day.

Pay for a Stranger's Meal

Yesterday I went through the drive thru at Chick Fil A and I paid for the person's meal behind me.

Ponderize Two Scriptures

Enos 1:4
And my soul hungered; and I kneeled down before my Maker, and I cried unto him in mighty prayer and supplication for mine own soul; and all the day long did I cry unto him; yea, and when the night came I did still raise my voice high that it reached the heavens.


2 Nephi 10:23
Therefore, cheer up your hearts, and remember that ye are free to act for yourselves--to choose the way of everlasting death or the way of eternal life.

These two scriptures are ones that I really want to remember for the rest of my life.

10 Pictures of Things

Letter to Myself

This contains a letter to myself that I will open in 10 years. I can't wait to see where I will be in that time frame.

10 Facts about USA that you didn't know

1. Apple has more money than the U.S. Treasury.

2. In Montana, cows out number people 3 to 1.

3. Alaska has a longer coastline than all of the other 49 U.S. states put together.

4. In 2013, women earned 60 percent of all bachelor’s degrees that were awarded that year in the United States.

5. The shortest and steepest railroad in the U.S., Dubuque: 60° incline, 296 feet

6. The oldest rock in the world, 3.8 billion years old, found in Minnesota River valley.

7.Rainbow Bridge, the largest natural stone bridge in the world, 290 feet high, 275 feet across

8.The only roller skating museum in the world, in Lincoln, Nebraska

9.Grasshopper Glacier, named for the grasshoppers that can still be seen frozen in ice

10.The longest main street in America, 33 miles, in Island Park

Source for Facts: http://www.factmonster.com/ipka/A0770175.html

Learn a New Crochet Pattern

Easy Cozy Crochet Blanket Pattern 

Materials:

• Bernat Baby Blanket Yarn – number of balls depends on the size you make it.
• Crochet Hook – US P/11.5 mm.
• Scissors

Directions:
Ch = chain, sl st = slip stitch, dc = double crochet (U.S.)
If you choose to make this blanket smaller or larger, for the initial chain, just be sure that the number of chains you use is divisible by 6. 42, 48, 54, 60, 66, 72. etc.
To join a new ball of yarn, tie the end if the yarn to the end of the 2nd ball and continue crocheting. Trim any ends that are sticking out.

1. Make a slip stitch and chain 60 stitches together, keeping tension even through the chain.
2. Not turning your work, count back 4 stitches from the hook and do 2 dc in the same spot, skip a chain, 2 dc and continue in the same manner along foundation chain until the end.
3. Once you reach the end, 1 dc in the last chain.
4. Ch 3 and turn.
5. 1 dc in first chain, skip 1 ch, 2 dc and repeat until the end (the 2 dc should be in between the “v” stitches front the first row)
6. Using the top chain on the end, place 1 dc. ch 3 and turn.
7. Continue steps 5 and 6 until you’ve made the blanket as long as you’d like. I made my blanket 50 rows.
8. Fasten off.
9. When adding the fringe, cut the yarn to about double the length you want the fringe to be (mine were 8 inches each total length). Fold your yarn in half and take the side with the loop and push it through the gap on each side of the 2 dc along the border of your blanket. Then get the side with the loose ends of the yarn and pull them tightly through the loop to secure. Continue until both ends of your blanket have fringe across the entire width of the blanket. Source for  the pattern http://dabblesandbabbles.com/easy-cozy-crochet-blanket/

Make a Photo Collage

I wasn't familiar with how to make collages so I jumped into that world by downloading an app that allows me to do just that. These are a couple of them that I made of my niece and nephew.

Watch a Movie I Have Never Seen Before

I have heard so much about this movie. Tonight I decided to watch it. I am not sure how I feel about this movie. The munchkins scare me and the flying monkeys are most likely going to give me nightmares. Over all though I thought it was a good movie. The Wicked Witch of the West is really green and scary. I think that my favorite character is the tin man. 

10 Interesting Facts about Birds

1. The oldest bird was known as an Archaeopteryx and lived about 150 million years ago. It was the size of a raven, was covered with feathers, and had wings.

2. A bird's normal body temperature is usually 7-8 degrees hotter than a human's. Up to three-quarters of the air a bird breathes is used just for cooling down since they are unable to sweat.

3.Penguins, ostriches, and dodo birds are all birds that do not fly.

4. Hummingbirds eat about every ten minutes, slurping down twice their body weight in nectar every day.

5.Falcons can swoop at over 200 mph.

6.The most yolks ever found in a single chicken's egg is nine.

7.  The world's only wingless bird is the kiwi of New Zealand.

8.The homing pigeon, Cher Ami, lost an eye and a leg while carrying a message in World War I. Cher Ami won the Distinguished Service Cross. Its leg was replaced with a wooden leg.

9.The only known poisonous bird in the world is the hooded pitohui of Papua, New Guinea. The poison is found in its skin and feathers.

10. The Royal Albatross' eggs take 79 days to hatch.

Source for Facts : Rupp, R. Everything You Never Learned About Birds. Storey Communications, Inc. Pownal, Vermont; 1995.

Pick Up a Used Book at the Library

I went to the Sandy City Library the other day to buy a used book but I didn't find one that I liked but I did go there. So I think that this counts, I found this picture online and it reminded me of how the aisle's look at he library

Say Yes to Everything for One Day

I tried to do this when I was with my niece and nephew. It worked mostly for the most part for a couple of hours but then it went back and forth for a while. I don't think that we truly understand the power of saying yes over saying no. I can only imagine what it would be like if we only said yes more often.

Leave a note for a waiter and Go to Dinner with a Friend

When I got home from the airport the other night my friend and I decided to go out to dinner to Red Robin. While we were there we had this amazing waiter his name was Anthony. He was pretty good looking to so I decided to be brave and leave him my phone number. my friend didn't think I would do it but indeed I did. I haven't heard anything from him but hey at least I did it.

Read a Book from Start to Finish in One Week

I read this book seven times to my nephew over the weekend. Even on the way home on the plan I could recite this book in my head. I love how much my nephew loves to read and even more how he loves this book. There are three different parts where the famous line of " a persons and a person no matter how small." If you pause when reading that line he will read it for you.

Decorate a Driveway in Sidewalk Chalk

I was in Cedar City last weekend and I took that opportunity to do sidewalk chalk with my niece and nephew. It was so much fun and the pictures turned out pretty great.

Glow In The Dark Bubbles and Sticks

So I followed all the instructions on Pinterest on how to make glow in the dark bubbles and for some reason it didn't work very well. It did have a tint to them but I never did figure out how to make them glow. However we busted out the glow sticks and played with them. I think that the glow sticks turned out to be even more fun then the bubbles would have been.

Make a Craft

Last weekend I went to Cedar City where I had craft day with my Sister-In-Law and a couple of friends. We made blocks similar to this craft that is pictured below. I do not take credit for this picture. It is just similar to the one we made.

Watch a Football Game Awake

This is quite a defeat for me. I don't stay awake during football. Unless I am at the stadium then it just doesn't happen for me. I am not sure if this will count but I did watch part of the BYU game and part of the Payson Lions game over the weekend. I was awake the whole time and actually remember Payson getting killed against Springville. Maybe one day I will learn how to stay awake through the whole thing.

Strike Up a Conversation with a Stranger

I had the opportunity to go to the SUU Bookstore with my family. While I was there I striked up a conversation with the cashier. He was a senior in school, on the basketball team and just had knee surgery. He was married and expecting a baby. He was hoping to stay in Cedar City. It was really nice to get to know him even for a brief moment.

Start a New TV Series that I Know Nothing About

I was house sitting a few weeks back and got interested in this tv series called Downton Abbey. I had heard the girls at work talk about it but never had an interest in it. I figured that I might as well go ahead and get into it. I started watching it and got caught up into it. However I only made it to the end of Season 3 where they killed off one of my favorite characters. I don't think that I will pick it up again.

Go to Lunch With a Friend

I love going to lunch with my friends. Last week I was able to go to lunch with three of my close friends. Brittanie, Marianne, Rick and I all got to go to Cheesecake Factory for lunch. I don't if a lot of you have been there before but their cheesecakes come with whip cream. Lots of whip cream come on top of these things. Rick decided to put all of the whip cream in his mouth. It totally made our day.

Build a Blanket Fort

What do four friends do on a Friday night after all the football games are over?!? We build a blanket fort. I have never built one before so I it was fun to get one thing done on the list together. We actually sat inside of it for a really long time. One day I might be brave enough to sleep in a blanket fort one night.

Write 10 Thank You Cards

It took me a couple of days to do it but I did it! I wrote 10 thank you cards to 10 people just randomly. I have to deliver some of them still and I am going to mail three of them too. I am so blessed to have so many friends.

Give Something to Someone with No Expectation of Giving Back

About three months ago I decided to make a blanket for a close friend of mine. It was not her birthday or any other big event. It was just something that I really wanted to do for her. I knew that by making this blanket that it would be something just because she is a good friend to me. It felt good to me to be able to give someone something that took me so much time to make. I loved being able to give someone that I care about something I made with great care.

See Something Majestic

I know that most people saw this amazing super moon tonight. It was unlike anything that I have ever seen. It always amazes me how much things likes this make me realize more of how much our Heavenly Father has created. I am grateful for the moments that remind me of the hand of the Lord is part of our everyday life. Tonight was a moment of that. The moon is something that I will never forget.

Help Someone Who Is Helping Me

Last weekend Spencer Savage was kind enough to help my family move some couches and furniture out of my Grandmother's home to my home and my aunt's home. There was a point where the bottom of a china hutch needed to be moved from the trailer to the inside of my aunt's home. Spencer was already helping my family by offering his truck and trailer. So while he was helping me I decided to help him back by moving the bottom of the china hutch with him. I don't know why but it was something that mean a lot to me. I got to help someone who was already helping me. I think that there is an important lesson in all of that.  I think that is how the world goes around. We help each other and then help back.

Go To A Bonfire With Friends

Spencer Savage holds a bonfire twice a year. He does one in May to kick off summer and then one in September that ends the summer. I was able to attend the one that ended the summer this weekend. There was a good turn out of about 35 people. The fire was huge, friends were great and the weather was perfect. My favorite part of the night was when there was just a few of us left and the fire was dying down. That is when you can truly just look at the fire. I asked the question; "Why is fire always so mesmerizing?" Spencer replied with the best answer. He said; "Because it is one of God's creation." It was a really good night.

30 Things In 30 Days Before I Turn 30

I have a close friend that made a list of 30 things she wanted to do before she was 30. I think that it is an amazing idea. However, I have procrastinate doing this up to this point. I turn 30 in  21 days so not exactly 30 things in 30 days. I have done some things over the past 8 days that I think might be noteworthy. I have posted the list below of the 30 things that I want to do before I turn the big 30. I have a goal to post everyday of the one thing that I do. Please enjoy them!!

List of 30 Things:
1. Go to a bonfire with friends.
2. Help someone who is helping me.
3. Give something to someone with no expectation of giving back.
4. Go to lunch with a friend
5.Start a new TV series that I know nothing about
6.Strike up a conversation with a stranger
7.Pick up a used books at the library
8. Go to dinner with a friend
9. Watch a whole football game awake
10.Build a blanket fort
11. Write 10 thank you cards
12.Ten facts about birds
13. Watch a movie I have never seen before
14. Make a craft
15. Make a photo collage
16. Decorate a driveway in sidewalk chalk
17. Read a book from start to finish in one week.
18. Learn  a new crochet pattern
19.Ponderize 2 scriptures
20.Learn a new work out
21. See something majestic
22. Write a letter to myself and open it in 10 years
23.Provide a house warming gift
24.Take a photograph of 10 new things
25.Leave a note for a waiter at a restaurant
26.Pay for a strangers meal
27. Have a phone free day
28.Say yes for everything for one day
29.Blow glow in the dark bubbles
30.Ten facts about the USA that I didn't know

There is the list. If anyone wants to join me on these let me know.